I find great comfort in the woods behind my condominium. As I look at the mature trees, I often find myself thinking about the parts of the trees and relate them to my life; my family; my journey. My roots began somwhere in South Korea but as a young seedling, I was transplanted to a small town in the midwest. The roots are my parents; biological; adoptive; step. I am the trunk and the many limbs that stem from that trunk represent different aspects of my life.
• Adoption
• Child abuse/neglect
• Surviving parental suicide
• Sibling Rivalry
• Being a mother
• Daycare/Pre-school
• Journey back to my Motherland of Korea
• Searching for birth family
• Marriage
• Divorce
• Parenting through Divorce
• Tales of employment/unemployment
• Careers
• Music and the impact it has had on my life
• Relationships
• Aging
The list could go on and on and on. As I study the trees, I often notice that some limbs die. They don't break off, just die. Then a storm or other act of nature comes and severs the limb from the tree. I relate that to relationships. The limb that represented my marriage was one of those limbs. It slowly died over time. Spring came and no buds formed there because it wasn't receiving the nutrients or nurturing that it needed. The limb still clings to the trunk and maybe someday will eventually fall off.
I could think about these trees and their patterns all day. I often think of what story the tree represents or I see people I know in the trunks and limbs of the trees.
Someone asked me the other day what inspires me to write. The trees in my backyard have inspired me to look at the big picture of life.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Monday, February 15, 2010
Planting seeds
When I was attending classes to earn my AAS in Paralegal Studies, I became friends with one of my professors, Leslie Adams. I enjoyed her friendship and our conversations over coffee. She planted the seed in my head that I should look into volunteering for CASA
http://www.casaforchildren.org/site/c.mtJSJ7MPIsE/b.5301295/k.BE9A/Home.htm
I researched the organization and thought that it would be interesting someday. The timing just wasn't right, yet that seed had been planted. After completing my studies, I got a job in a law firm that specialized in business and real estate law. Nothing more exciting than pushing paper. I found no satisfaction in assisting the wealthy as they fought amongst themselves. It just wasn't me.
About 3 years ago, I decided to apply for a paid Guardian ad Litem position (one who represents the best interest of a child in a court system.) I knew that the chances were slim, since they were looking for a 4 year degree, even if I decided to apply as a volunteer. I was frustrated that life experience didn't seem to count for anything. When I turned in my resume and app, I was turned off by the individual with whom I met. I wanted to tell him, "Really, you work with individuals who advocate for children? You pretty much suck the bag and I don't want to be affiliated with you." I'm sure it was a defense mechanism because I felt rejected. I feel like I was pre-judged based on being an adoptee and I'm pretty sure he took my app and tossed it as soon as I walked out the door.
My life is in a much different place now and the Guardian ad Litem seed started to grow again. I began researching different programs in my area and sent out an inquiry to CASA. Last week I attended an informational meeting and I have an interview tomorrow. YAHOO! It is a volunteer position and at this time, I can work it into my schedule.
I have worked with children who are in the foster care system, counseled individuals who have suffered abuse, neglect, emotional pain and helped them begin the healing process. I know I can't save the world. I will learn what the boundaries are. I just want individuals to know that no matter what has happened in their life, no matter who they are, they are worthy of being loved. They have self worth and can set their own paths.
It's all in the timing. Years ago when that seed was planted, there was no water, sunshine or rich soil to allow that seed to grow. The elements are in place for the seed to grow and take root.
Thanks to Leslie Adams for seeing the potential in me and planting that seed.
http://www.casaforchildren.org/site/c.mtJSJ7MPIsE/b.5301295/k.BE9A/Home.htm
I researched the organization and thought that it would be interesting someday. The timing just wasn't right, yet that seed had been planted. After completing my studies, I got a job in a law firm that specialized in business and real estate law. Nothing more exciting than pushing paper. I found no satisfaction in assisting the wealthy as they fought amongst themselves. It just wasn't me.
About 3 years ago, I decided to apply for a paid Guardian ad Litem position (one who represents the best interest of a child in a court system.) I knew that the chances were slim, since they were looking for a 4 year degree, even if I decided to apply as a volunteer. I was frustrated that life experience didn't seem to count for anything. When I turned in my resume and app, I was turned off by the individual with whom I met. I wanted to tell him, "Really, you work with individuals who advocate for children? You pretty much suck the bag and I don't want to be affiliated with you." I'm sure it was a defense mechanism because I felt rejected. I feel like I was pre-judged based on being an adoptee and I'm pretty sure he took my app and tossed it as soon as I walked out the door.
My life is in a much different place now and the Guardian ad Litem seed started to grow again. I began researching different programs in my area and sent out an inquiry to CASA. Last week I attended an informational meeting and I have an interview tomorrow. YAHOO! It is a volunteer position and at this time, I can work it into my schedule.
I have worked with children who are in the foster care system, counseled individuals who have suffered abuse, neglect, emotional pain and helped them begin the healing process. I know I can't save the world. I will learn what the boundaries are. I just want individuals to know that no matter what has happened in their life, no matter who they are, they are worthy of being loved. They have self worth and can set their own paths.
It's all in the timing. Years ago when that seed was planted, there was no water, sunshine or rich soil to allow that seed to grow. The elements are in place for the seed to grow and take root.
Thanks to Leslie Adams for seeing the potential in me and planting that seed.
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